Not A Pink Girl

Little things that make up a life

January 18, 2009
1 Comment

Social networking sites like Facebook have a life of their own. I am fascinated by the friendships that are born & developed on these online gathering places.

Right now there’s a viral thing going around fb called “25 Random Things.” I think it’s interesting because just a couple of dozen stream-of-consciousness facts about one’s life can really tell a new acquaintance quite a bit about one.

I was asked by a fb friend (whom I know through my local Democratic Committee, of which we are both members) to tell him 25 random things about myself. Here they are. At the end of my “things,” I’m including the “rules” one is supposed to follow when posting these on Facebook.

I would love to hear your comments.

Kathie’s 25 Random Things

1. I’ve never seen an episode of the television shows “Frasier,” “Friends” or “House” (& have no plans to ever watch one).

2. There have been precious few times in the past three decades that I haven’t turned my head when a kid called out, “Hey Mom!”

3. Used to fantasize that Mister Rogers was my real dad.

4. I’ve met many “celebrities” (Cal Ripken Jr., Jack Nicholson, Brian Wilson, Fred Couples & Joe Theismann, for example).

5. Spent the coldest night of my life (29 degrees F) sleeping in a tent on the ground at the foot of Devil’s Tower, Wyoming (from “Close Encounters of the Third Kind” fame).

6. I’ve ridden the New York City subway by myself (& gotten on the wrong train only once).

7. Quit smoking cold turkey & have been an obnoxious nonsmoker for 23 years (which proves you don’t need all the nicotine gum, patches, etc. that our capitalist society insists are necessary to quit).

8. I’ve been to so many concerts I’m not sure I could list them all: Paul McCartney & Wings, Elton John (3 times [front row twice]), Lou Reed, Robert Palmer, Bruce Springsteen (3 times), David Bowie (twice), Madonna (twice), the Beastie Boys (before anyone knew who they were & when everyone thought I was crazy), the Eagles (in the olden days [3 times, once when Linda Ronstadt opened for them & once when a “new act” opened for them named Jimmy Buffett & The Coral Reefer Band]), Rosemary Clooney, Alison Krauss & Union Station, so many more.

9. I’ve stood crying in front of Vincent van Gogh’s “Self Portrait with a Straw Hat” @ The Metropolitan Museum of Art & didn’t care what anyone thought.

10. I’ve represented myself in a court of law.

11. I’ve done past-life regression through hypnosis three times & once through guided imagery.

12. I’ve fallen in love at first sight (as an adult, when it really counts & really hurts).

13. I’ve helped deliver a baby (twice).

14. Have seen Kevin Costner, Tom Selleck, Michael Jordan & Garth Brooks play baseball in an MLB park.

15. Been a Friend of Bill W. since 1986.

16. Told Clinton Portis not to worry because we love him, no matter what. To his face.

17. Went to Catholic school all my life, including college.

18. Learned how to knit when I was 7 years old.

19. I have a recurring dream about the flowers in my garden: I dream I miss their flowering & go outside to look at them & they’re all dead. How does a woman get so sad? See #12.

20. Was chosen to be in a class debate in the 5th grade. I could be Richard Nixon or George McGovern. I chose Shirley Chisholm. That didn’t go over too big.

21. I have no idea what anyone sees in Brad Pitt, & think Angelina Jolie looks like a ghoul who feasts on dead bodies.

22. Luciano Pavarotti’s voice causes me to get head-to-toe goosebumps; Andrea Bocelli has the voice of an angel (his duet with Celine Dion, The Prayer, makes me cry); & Mario Lanza’s singing was technically near-perfect but just doesn’t touch my soul.

23. The doctor who delivered me also delivered my daughter.

24. Had a pen pal from Hilo, Hawaii, when I was 11 until I graduated from high school.

25. Saw Lew Alcindor play basketball professionally many times before he changed his name.

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you.

If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you.

(To do this, go to “notes” under tabs on your profile page, paste these instructions in the body of the note, type your 25 random things, tag 25 people [in the right hand corner of the app] then click post.)

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Love ya. Mean it! Or not.

July 12, 2008
2 Comments

I went to Hagerstown Maryland on Saturday with my husband. Which part of that sentence is the shocker? The fact that my husband & I actually went somewhere together that didn’t involve our son. Sad, huh? It just seems like we go our separate ways lately. Well, more like for the last 3 years (maybe more). That’s just how it’s become. I think things evolve like that when you’re married as long as we’ve been. He works full time & I’m an at-home mom (or stay-at-home-mom, or SAHM). There are days when we don’t see each other at all. He’ll leave at zero-dark-thirty & I’ll still be asleep. I might be out when he gets home from work. I go to bed late; he goes to bed early.

Why do people stay married so long? It seems like such an artificial state. Do people stay married so they can have an ad in the Sunday paper weddings & anniversaries section that says, “Mr. & Mrs. Rhett Butler are celebrating their golden anniversary on a private island in the Caribbean.” The part that article leaves out is the fact that the couple will only exchange about 6 words between them the whole week they’re gone “celebrating.”

I think long marriages look much better on paper than they do on a daily basis. Do people stay married because it’s like a marathon race, & they’ve trained so hard for this & stayed in it for so long that it would just be sad to quit just before the finish line?

Think about it. What’s the purpose of staying married?

You might say, “Well, a couple should stay together for the children.” Okay.

Let’s say a couple’s been married for 30 years. They might have 3 kids, ages 27, 25, & 23. None of their kids lives with them.

Age-27 is renting a room in an old Victorian in Santa Cruz CA & works at a restaurant as a bartender. During his off-time he gets a little surfing in, hangs out at the neighborhood Barnes & Noble listening to bites of the newest prog rock CDs, & trying to figure out where his next bag of pot’s coming from.

Age-25 lives in Denver CO. She just got her master’s degree in fine art; she’s sharing a condo with a girlfriend from college who also happens to be her significant-other (something she knows her parents aren’t ready to deal with, so she’s never told them). She works as the assistant manager of a ski shop & keeps her ear to the ground for jobs at galleries in Cherry Creek North & LoDo. She finds herself drinking much more & eating much less as each week goes by without her getting a “real” job. But all the girls her age drink; doesn’t everybody? (She would never think to refer to herself as a “woman;” she doesn’t have any idea what her mother & grandmother had to suffer through in order to be respected as adults & not just “chicks” or “gals”.)

Age-23 didn’t go to college & still lives at home with Mom & Dad. He’s quiet & sweet; he’s great company to his parents. He likes to read fiction & sleep late. He watches lots of Netflix & doesn’t believe in God. He doesn’t date much which really isn’t a big deal. He has friends of both sexes he sees once or twice a week when he goes out for pizza with them. His parents come too & sit at a separate table; when the bill comes, Mom & Dad pay for both parties, theirs & their son & his friends. Age-23 works at the local no-kill animal shelter & makes a little more than minimum wage. He isn’t interested in owning a car & borrows his mom’s, or has his parents pick him up or drop him off. He doesn’t drink alcohol or smoke anything.

So should the parents stay together for the kids? I’ll talk about their hypothetical marriage in a future post.

A couple I know just filed for divorce. They have four kids & have been married for about 16 years. The brick of a husband (I use the word “brick” as a pejorative because he used to be as dependable as a rock but now he has proven himself to be as dumb as a bag of pea gravel) revealed to his wife (an at-home mom) that he met someone in nearby West Virginia where he worked & he is leaving his wife for her. Just to put the cherry on the cake of this story, he told his wife he was leaving her on Christmas Day.

More later!


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